Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Secrets!


Secrets!  Secrets!    
Who knows a great secret?


Do you?

What is it!   No, don't tell me.  If you did, it wouldn't be a secret!  Unless I promised not to tell, that is.  Then, it would still be a secret ... wouldn't it?  Or, would it?

Are you still keeping a secret that you promised never to tell years ago?  


Why?

Is it something that you're embarrassed to tell?  Or, is it simply better that no one knows about it?  Could it harm you in adult life?  Or, is it something you've done as an adult that you don't want your spouse to know about?

Did you mess around on your spouse?  Did you lie to them about something else?  Did you use someone else as an example at the dinner table just to see what type of reaction your spouse would express?


Was it really that bad?

Or, is it a secret you will carry to your grave with you?  Is it so horrendous that you're afraid your entire family will disown you for doing?  If so, how do you live with yourself?  Isn't it eating you alive as it slowly creeps toward exposure, only to be shoved back inside time after time?

Would it put you in jail if known?  Would the authorities come bursting down the door to handcuff you and carry you off to the slammer for years?  Or, would the judge simply laugh about it, give you a token fine, and send you on your way?

Everyone keeps temporary secrets annually.  It's called not telling what you bought someone for Christmas.  Are you good at hiding it inside?  Or, when questioned, does your face give the answer away?  


So, are you good at keeping the secrets, or not?  Would a spotlight and rubber hose get information out of you, or would it take the old bamboo shoots under the fingernails to get the job done?  

Are you a member of the Mafia?  Can't tell?  So, if you can't tell me you are, you must be ... right?  


Don't tell me, 
I'm sure you'd have to kill me if you did.

Secrets are only told on a need to know basis ... or, are they?   Is telling a secret something that is done out of spite, or is it a power hang-up?  ("I know something you don't.")   Or, do you simply decide that it no longer matters to anyone and spew it out for the hell of it?  


If it no longer matters, what made it so important before?

Is our life ruled by the secrets we hide deep within?  Do our actions today revolve around the secrets we've kept hidden in the past?  Do we avoid areas of life that we've visited before, only to find ourselves too weak to resist what they offer?


Or, is it simply a secret you'd rather not tell?

I remember having secrets in my youth.  My mother once decided that I needed to take cold pork and bean sandwiches for school lunches.  I hated them and refused to eat them.  Yet, I could find no way to dispose of them with the teacher's eyes constantly on me.  So, I'd wait until I got off the school bus and stuff them into a drain in front of the house.

My father discovered them one day.  My secret had been found out!  It seemed even the stray dogs and cats in the area didn't like pork and bean sandwiches.  My mother, after getting over the anger and hurt, finally decided that lunch meat might get eaten.  It was a turning point in my school lunch life.

On Classmates.com, I've discovered several girls had crushes on me in high school.  They finally decided that keeping these childhood secrets didn't do them any good back then and really didn't matter much to them today.  So, they've confessed.

I wish I would've known back then.  My life might have been completely different.

Which leads to the question, "Does keeping secrets change the directions of life for those not only keeping the secrets, but those whom from the secrets are kept?"

Could keeping these secrets be a negative in the spectrum of life?  Could the childish and selfish minds that seek to keep the knowledge solitary be hindering the options of the happiness that life could offer?


Or, could it be better that we don't know everything?  

Do you know?

Or, is it a secret?


 (Here's your chance to get a deep, dark secret off your chest.  Just comment below!)


25 comments:

  1. ... that's not fair! (This) question is at least 5 Posts worth of material and content (...and I won't tell you more, because it's a). So I guess I'll just have to pass, but today's Post reminds me of the time, (...wait a minute, it's a)

    Alright, I'll stop now.
    It's rare to have a clever little 'hook' for a Comment wear itself out so quickly! lol
    Of course, I totally love the concept (of the role, function and effect of) keeping secrets, next to the emotion of envy it has to be the most under-rated yet still most significant emotional experience in a person's life.
    Can't wait to see the Comments.
    (no, I will stay away from the 'secret tie-in' to close out my Comment.)

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    1. Clark - Seriously, if you feel the need to tell, feel free ... I can keep a secret! lol Actually, my wife used to have a new Secret every couple of weeks. That was before she changed deodorant brands. Still, there are times I wished she'd go back to keeping the Secret. It was cheaper than some of the alternatives she comes up with, and more effective. I agree, the emotions involved in keeping a secret can provide extreme pressure on a person. I remember a time of drug usage that the secret needed be kept not only from employers, but relatives. Funny, the relatives had figured it out long before. Makes me wonder if some of the employers hadn't done so, also. Hmmmmmm! Many thanks!

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  2. Way to cute Richard... beans cold on bread... Hmmm. Now tell us about the after effects.
    Mom thought lard from the fry pan was a delicacy... and they wondered why I ate so much supper and the neighbours dog gained weight... lol... it used to wait for me at the school everyday... Sandy was a good dog.

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    1. Rolly - So very good of you to stop by, my friend! As you've probably guessed, I've left HP's for blogging. Their hiding of material was the last straw. I wish I'd have been as lucky as you with the dog. One good, hungry canine could have saved my tail with the pork and bean episode. Your lard reminds me of the salt pork hunk that awaited me in the cold p & b's. One bite and the gag reflex was immediate. lol Many thanks!

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  3. I was never good at keeping secrets from the ones I am closets to and even now I still not good at this at all. And besides secrets have a way of coming back to bite you in the butt many times, so I guess I don't have to truly worry about that, lol!!

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    1. Janine - I suspect you're keeping a deep, dark secret from your youth that you've hidden so deeply that it is now only remembered when triggered by a rare experience. (That's my esp coming to the surface ... as well as an attempt to get you to talk, lol). I'll bet you may have done something to a girl in class that called you a name that no one knows "who did it" to this day. Okay, okay ... so I'm a bad guesser! lol Secrets do have a way of haunting one. I remember when ... Many Thanks!

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  4. I'm not great at secrets but if I do keep one, I generally try to make certain I won't get arrested for it. LOLOL...
    And I bet you nearly died when your dad discovered all the sandwiches. I have to say I did laugh when you discovered that not even the neighborhood animals cared for them. HAHAHA.
    Hopefully there weren't like 30 of them. Or were there? Or is it a secret?
    You know what kinds of secrets I like finding the answers to? Things like the Knights Templar or the Masons...or those Sacred Feminine groups...hehe...I WANT to know their secrets. Why? Dunno. Just a curiosity. :)

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    1. Cyndi - I'll bet you have many that you don't want others to know about ... as we all do! lol (You changed the topic too quickly to escape telling them, didn't you? lol) The discovery day was a traumatic experience. Unfortunately, when the bus stopped, my father was standing right by the sewer pipe. To make matters worse, I had another sandwich to toss in there still with me from that day's lunch. lol What my mother hadn't figured out was that the bread would be saturated by the juice of the p & b's withing a matter of minutes after wrapping them. To try to get them out of the bag in one piece was impossible. Plus, having sat in the coat closet, unrefridgerated, all morning, didn't help the situation at all. All I remember is saying over and over, "Well, send it to the starving kids overseas!" lol Your curiosity as to the secret societies could lead you into danger. I understand several utilize Mafia tactics to keep them secret. What size cement overshoes do you wear? lol Many thanks!

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    2. I couldn't wait to see what you said about the whole sandwiches thing. LOL...ewwwww. Your mama HAD to have understood. I mean...soggy p & b sandwiches? I can imagine the lovely scent by lunchtime.
      Mafia? Yeah, I'll stay away. They scare me. I'll just poke my nose in a book and see what others say...I'll let them risk their lives.
      Not that I don't risk mine. I've dangled off plenty of cliffs and gotten run over by cars - literally, but those are stories for a whole 'nother time. :)

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  5. Richard, always love your sense of humor...lol

    Secrets if kept for someone's benefit should be good cause it always lets out the best in the person. I am pretty good in keeping secrets of people. Dunno which part of my body it goes and settles in though cause I definitely don't keep it in my brain thus, don't remember it...lol

    Great post!!

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    1. Ruchira - So good of you to visit. Glad you enjoyed this piece. When would a secret kept for someone's benefit not be good, unless it means that wrongdoing has taken place? And, if wrongdoing has taken place, is the secret really benefiting the person, or does it simply become a lie being hidden? Just some food for thought, lol. I sometimes wonder if secrets really benefit anyone, for the most part. Perhaps, we are the ones playing God by deciding another person doesn't need to know. Or, perhaps our common sense is the culprit that is doing the deciding. Interesting. Many thanks!

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  6. I think whether the secret should be kept or not depends on what the secret is. In the case of Bush's baked beans (which are way better than Van Camp's, by the way), keeping that family recipe a secret is a travesty.

    WHAT DO THEY PUT IN THOSE BEANS TO MAKE THEM SO DELICIOUS?! I'm thinking I need to buy some dog treats and bribe the dog. It's the only way.

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    1. Lisa - Really good to see you here! Let me know what the dog has to say when you find out! I'm a fan of Bush's Baked Beans, too! I don't believe they were available way back during my childhood, though. We had Van Camp's, Stokeley's, and the regular store brand versions, but I'm thinking Bush's came a few years after the 60's (the Stone Age years). lol This kind of reminds me of the secret recipe of "herbs and spices" that Kentucky Fried Chicken hid for years. For years, their employees had to sign a statement forbidding them to ever spread the word on that secret. I think KFC still offers the smallest pieces of chicken of any chicken chain, but survives because of the taste it provides. Many thanks!

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  7. Wow... I have to say, this is probably one of the more powerful things I think I have ever read. Well written. I think secrets come in all shapes and sizes. Everybody has them... it is just a matter of why you share them. Well done!

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    1. Stacy - Really good to see you here! I'm pleased you saw the depth of thought I attempted to offer here. The pathways that secrets provide the human to travel are multiple, and always take a little bit of the person with them. How much depends on the good/bad reasoning of the knowledge, and its conflict with the soul of the individual that carries it. In sharing the secret, the person releases the responsibilities of hiding, either to lessen their load, or simply because they've recognized the importance they initially thought present was only a fantasy. Really glad you got this one instead of just looking at it as another semi-comedic offering. Many thanks!

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  8. This post made me think of this song: http://youtu.be/o5p-uspcgRY

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    1. Tamara - So good of you to visit my humble blog abode! Wow! Whatta song! I don't know if the song or the strange comments below it got to me more! lol The multitude of stories that have been written of this topic, as well as the number of true cases, is amazing. If one is no longer around, the secret is indeed safe with them. I believe many criminals have used that for years as an excuse to end the possibilities of imprisonment ... or worse. Many Thanks!

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  9. I keep confidences. Secrets would have to be kept on a time-by-time basis, depending how serious they were, I think.

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    1. Considerer - Really good of you to visit! Like you, it is my belief that when a person relays something to me, it is being told in confidence. It is up to others to tell the world, not myself, as I hold their trust dearly. Of course, gifts being held as a present should be kept a secret for the surprise element. The seriousness, as you state, is the determining factor in holding it within, or lessening one's stress. Many thanks!

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  10. Shew, Rich, thought provoking post for this morning. I think I'm pretty good at keeping secrets that others tell me. As far as my own secrets go, I have one or two that I haven't told many people and I don't intend to. It's way too personal and it's not something I'd necessarily want people knowing. I have gotten better about speaking more about things that have happened in the past that bothered me and letting me move on in life instead of letting it take over my life. All I was doing was blaming others and, yes, being selfish about it. I think we all have secrets. Big ones and little ones. We need to decide who we trust to share the big ones with so that they don't consume us. Just my thoughts, anyway. Have a great Wednesday!

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    1. Melanie - How are you, my friend? Sorry I missed this comment yesterday. I agree we all have secrets ... it's just a matter of either us controlling them, or them controlling us. I really appreciate your honesty here. Some great thoughts expressed. Many thanks!

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  11. I was vacuuming under the couch, and I found that the cats had scratched the hell out of the heirloom Oriental carpet. Both the cats and the carpet are my husband's. I don't know who or which he loves more. I'm afraid to tell him, because I'm afraid he will kill the cats. Hmm...I thought I'd feel better. I don't... On another note, I wish I found out people from high school had crushes on me!

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    1. Rachel - So good to see you! If your husband's temper is like most men's, it might be best to let him discover it on his own. I think I might start hiding the cats, especially if he ever drops anything and it rolls under the couch! : ) Somehow, you make me believe that the cats are more yours than his. lol I'm sure many were deeply in love with you in high school. I was so consumed with one girl for three years, that I simply never noticed any others. My loss, for sure. Many thanks!

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  12. Argh, I'm horrible about many secrets (well, there are SOME that I will take to my grave, I hope...) and people were shocked when I married my husband who has one of THOSE jobs where he honestly cannot tell us what he's working on. Drove me crazy in the early days. Now? I'm cool with it. He can have his secrets. As long as they don't involve other vaginas, drugs or illicit behavior.

    Awesome funny post, as always :)

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    1. Kristi - Really good to see you visiting here. Please accept my apologies for being absent recently. My work has been extremely demanding as of late. You may be surprised what may not be important in a few years. At one time, I held some very deeply. However, as time has passed, I've found myself telling them and laughing about them. Seems like you're forgiven for things passed once you get to a certain age. Some even make you a little more human to others. lol I've been where your husband is decades ago. Just have faith in him and believe him. Whatever he's doing, I'm sure it's important. Many thanks!

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