Friday, January 25, 2013

Here we go again! Finish the Sentence Friday!

Kids always do just the right thing
at just the right moment!

"Well I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now."

Bob Dylan wrote those words over half a century ago.  Funny thing was, you didn't need to inhale certain garden variety herbs to understand what they meant.  Many of us did anyway!

This is "Finish the Sentence Friday" again.  Something tells me, this thing has caught on.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Friends of all nations.  I present to you, for your consideration, four hostesses of this marvelous event!  These are all devoted individuals that know no boundaries when it comes to asking others to divulge the idiocies of their past, and secretly huddle in serene fits of pleasure giggles when reading how much some people will, indeed, divulge.  Will you please put your hands together and after a warm round of applause, please squeeze that mouse to visit them one and all!"

Your hostesses are:

Stephanie's  Mommy for Real
Dawn's  Dawn's Disaster

Okay, so I'm old school.  They claim to be hosts, but the correct word I was raised with was hostess.  I'm pretty sure none have had operations to become hostesses, so calling them hosts would insinuate that they were once of another gender, or wish to be.  Okay, now I'm confused!

And Janine's singing, "Like Always!"

So, what does all of this have to do with Bob Dylan's song?  No, I didn't forget about that.  I just decided to tell you what was going on before really getting into the story line.  Patience! Patience!

Anyway, this week's sentence, or part of a sentence (Since it has no ending, it's really not a complete sentence, yet.  That's why it's called "Finish the Sentence Friday.")  is:

"When I was younger, I tried ..... "

So, without further ado, I believe it's now time to finish the sentence with a story of some type.  "Isn't that right, Janine?"

I can hear her hissing now, "Scooch!"   

When I was younger, I tried out a very corrupt philosophy.  I was nine years old, an avid reader, and had an imagination that combined logic with insanity to create theories not yet proven wrong to one so young.  

Some call it stupidity, or, 
a reason to keep your eyes on what your kids are doing at all times!

We had lived in the country with my grandparents farm as my backyard.  There were very few kids within a mile to play with, so I spent much of my time alone, reading, and imagining possibilities.  I knew about gravity (having fallen out of trees a time or two), so I knew the basics of what goes up must come down.

However, I also had much time to reason things out.  I knew that leg bones were straight, like boards were.  If you dropped a board from the hayloft on its end, it would simply bounce.  If it landed on it's side, it could break.  So, logic told me that anything straight could withstand much more impact if it landed correctly.

Somehow, I started believing that even if one dropped out of an airplane, they'd only be injured if they didn't land standing up!  I know, somewhat flawed.  But, to a nine year old, it made sense!

I see another theory about
to be proven!
I soon learned that we were going to have next door neighbors!  A gentleman that had worked with my grandfather had purchased a couple of acres of land right next to us and was building a house.  For weeks, I watched this future home rise high.  It wasn't going to be a single level home, but a split level, with the second floor facing our house.

Finally, one day, after the carpenters had left, I wandered over to the house.  I climbed up to the second floor and peered out at my house, amazed to be so high.  That was when I noticed the ladder going up to the uncompleted roof.  

Yep, I did it!  I climbed right up that ladder and stood atop the second floor.  The ground seemed so far away.  Yet, I knew it was the right time to test out my theory!

Kate's going, "OMG, Rich you were a dumbass even as a kid!"

Leaning out over the edge, precariously balancing back and forth, I was trying to gain the courage I needed to make that final leap.  I knew the house was built on a downward slope, so the ground was even further away than the foundation of the house.  Still, I needed to see if my thoughts made sense!

I leaned forward and jumped!

For a moment, I was soaring downward.  It's amazing how quickly Mother Earth will end that!

I landed feet first, but my forward motion immediately sent me rolling down the slope.  Over and over I tumbled, finally stopping at least twenty feet from the original landing zone.  

That's when the pain was first noticed.

My ankles were on fire, my knees were exploding, and my back was still trying to pop itself back into its normal position.  I wanted to cry out (and just cry, too), but I knew my mom would hear me and probably beat the hell out of my tail for pulling such a stunt.

Slowly, I got up, found no broken bones, and shook off the pain.

Regardless of popular opinion, this is NOT
proper landing position!
I had proven my theory!  I wasn't as stupid as the adults thought I was!  You could survive a fall from great heights if you landed on your feet!  

When we're young, we love to prove that we know more than adults, so we go to extremes to do so.  We take the chances that adults won't take because of their "educated" fears.  Oh, adults will come into the room and face closet monsters, but it's the kids who are the ones that attempt to prove you can do anything if you put your mind to it!  So, in a way, they're mentally older than those that allow fear to control them!  

"I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now!"

Now, where's that airplane?