Friday, January 2, 2015

Love in a Photo, Population Control, and TTOT

Did you ever want to write a post that everyone would read and say, "Damn, that came out of you?"

How would you do it?
  • Would it be a thing of artistic beauty ... melting words of love into visionary delight?
  • Would it be something so meaningful that all would be humbled after perusing it?
  • Would it be something of humor that would make everyone smile?
  • Would it be a fantasy adventure in which the reader would lose themselves in a new and distant world?
  • Would it be a tale about your kids or pets that you felt could assist others in raising their own?
  • Would it be a party filled escapades taking life to the limits?
  • Or, would it be something entirely different than anything you've ever written before?

Let's blend all of the above together 
and see what I can come up with.

"Her photo was so much different than the sixteen year old girl with which I'd once fallen deeply in love.  I remembered her glowing black hair, straight as one hundred nightly brush strokes could make it, wildly cascading down onto her shoulders.  Now, the picture showed an older lady with uplifted hair cemented in place with hairspray.  I shivered as I remembered that was the spitting image of her mother and the way she'd worn her hair back in the 60's.  

I'm glad it didn't work out.

Love was so damn powerful in my youth.  It was the binding that softly held my heart together and then ripped it so violently apart. Together, we knew we could move mountains, but somewhere along the way, it was discovered that the mountains didn't need to move on ... we did.

Oh, we held each other tight in a desire to never let the other go at times.  But, in the end, letting go wasn't as hard as it should have been.  Not like losing a pet, anyway.

See, pets get into your soul.  They only want to give and get love.  They're so generous with their affection for their owners that the owners sometimes take that for granted.  We may not give back as much time, love and attention as they give,  but they seem to be okay with that as long as we don't entirely forget them.  Sad thing is that we remember them most when they do pass on ... and the tears start to flow.

The photo I stared at in my hand was of another person ... one I did not know.  One that did take love for granted, cast it aside, and sought the attentions of another, and then another, and then ... well, she slept around, damnit!

For three years we soared through the galaxy of young lovers, cresting the horizons of foreign solar systems, resting in each other's arms on memory foam white clouds (with no need for pillowcases), and envisioning a new life ... one without conflict, war, or demonstrations.  The Lord would be our guide into the future, as the tour bus of flight enlightened our beliefs into the world of the hereafter.  

I should have guessed something was amiss.  The bus never stopped for a bathroom break.  Come to think of it, we must have been suffering some real constipation as we never thought to ask the driver to pull over.  I'm sure he would have frowned, handed us an empty Coke bottle, and said, "Try this.  Things go better with Coke!"

Can you remember the need of holding hands?  Fingers interlocked ever so gently, a squeeze now and then to display your tenderness for the other, and the feeling of never wanting to let go wavering not.  Can you recall turning to face the other, leaning over ever so slowly and allowing the lips to simply brush, saving the passion for its own time and place?  Was it innocence or fear that held us there in that moment, staring deeply into each others eyes?  

Possibly fear as her father did run a bulldozer and was a fairly huge and muscular man!

But, the picture didn't show that girl.  Instead, a woman, face creased with wrinkles of a trying life and several failed relationships, staring up at me from the photo I held.  Perhaps, this was the end result of the girl that wanted to hold someone else's hand in the school hallways after I'd graduated and went off to college.  A girl that went seeking the bad boy of the dark side for excitement that I hadn't been able to supply, as I'd even gotten baptized in her church to be a part of her family.  A girl that always wanted more, even after I'd given her more gifts and nights out than she'd ever had before.

A girl that simply wasn't satisfied with love.

The photo reminded me of what I did have.  I turned to look at my sleeping wife of 34 years on the couch, gently snoring away.  Her looks had changed as mine had over the years, but she was still beautiful to me.  She didn't look like her mother nor her dad (Thank God!), but like a tattooless angel of mercy upon a Harley, searching for a rest stop instead of a Coke bottle.  

She'd married, hoping for someone to be a good father to her two girls, and a good husband to her.  Oh, I'd failed that many times in the past, and will probably fail it again in the future.  Still, it didn't mean that she had to give up her imaginary Harley, or me my imaginary Lamborghini.  It just meant that we could get up in the morning, hold each other for a moment, and remember that we'd always be together to keep the trying alive.  At least for a few more years.  Then, it would be lonely until each of us would be joined again to hold hands once more.

I took the photo of the woman I no longer knew and put it inside of a reference book by my computer.  I might visit her every once in a while.  It won't be to remember the fondness of a relationship of a star burst long gone, but as a reminder as to how much better I now have it with the picture eliminated from the picture of my life.  

Please, though, don't tell my wife.  She'd only suspect me wanting to create something out of the past.  Let her sleep on her Harley for a while.  She needs the rest."

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See, one never really know what in the hell
 I'm going to come up with next!

This week, I'm Thankful For:

1)  Playstation Rocks!   In Denver, a young girl opened up a Christmas present, a new Playstation 4, only to find two bags of rocks.  Now, one might suspect this would be an adult's way of saying, "You'll be dumb as a rock if you spend all your time on this damn thing."  Wrong!  Seems the uncle had purchased it at Walmart for her and had no knowledge of the rocks.

When store staff was approached and questioned, it was finally discovered that the Playstation 4 had been a return item, and no one had bothered to open the box to check to see if the unit was really what the box held inside.  (Hope they don't check the riding lawn mower box I just returned!) So, the customer got his money back, Walmart got a box or rocks, and the young girl got nothing for Christmas.

(And that, boys and girls, is the way the Walmart Grinch stole Christmas!)

2)  Population Control.  AirAsia and a burning Greek ferry added to the annual death toll of human beings killed in transportation accidents this week.  This, along with holiday highway death tolls rounded off a good year of population control.  Since man is conquering many of the illnesses that once held the world's population in check, the only thing keeping Soylent Green (a 70's movie where anyone over 30 was made into food for the populace) from becoming a reality is the stupidity involving most of these accidents.  As long as mankind continues to make these multi death errors, and toy with smart phones and indulge in drugs and alcohol while driving, most of us over 30 crowd can be safe from becoming tomorrow's lunch for everyone else!  (Besides, I just can't see myself as being offered as today's special on any menu!  "Yes, our special for the day comes from years of tenderizing and coddled living.  The fat has properly spread throughout the meat structure, making it deliciously sweet to the pallet and exceptionally easy to chew.  Free of any El Toro defecation, it's Rich on today's buffet.  Enjoy heartedly, but remember, supplies are limited!")

3)  New Year's Resolutions.  I love New Year's Resolutions
Make Them To Break Them,
That's All We Do!
so much that I leave them to everyone else to make and break.  A New Year's Resolution is like attending a self help class, getting motivated, and find out that you have no intent on following through with any type of changes when real life smacks you in the face.  

So, this year, I've decided to be one of the few honest people in the world and not make myself promises I have no intent on keeping.  I think it's enough to plan on inventing a mind bomb to create a lower atmospheric explosion that will shock all brains into practicing common sense, re-establishing a government that will work for the people instead of against the people, and find a way to keep my readers from getting pissed off at me when I go to extremes!  (Well, maybe two out of three won't be that difficult!)  

4)  Infant Murders Mother.  A mother was shot dead by her two year old infant son in an Idaho Walmart this week.  It is reported that the child reached inside the mother's purse and discharged a concealed pistol.  The bullet traveled into the mother, killing her instantly.

(You can be sure, State Troopers were called to the scene, and using a taser on the child was discussed.  However, when the smell of dirty diapers permeated the air, it was decided that further violence was not necessary.  They grabbed the child and carried it from the store in a set of toy, plastic handcuffs.  As soon as lawyers decide whether to try the child as an adult or juvenile, charges will be filed, protests will be called for nationwide, and Al Sharpton will proclaim the child was abused and following the only course of action it had left, which leave the door wide open for harsher premeditated charges to be filed.)  
Only in America and at Walmart, 
"Your Killing Place!"

5)  NYPD Refusing To Make Arrests.  After two officers were shot down in an ambush this last week, NYPD officers have turned their backs on the mayor and his administration.  Sadly, this may also flow over to the general public as they are now refusing to arrest or pursue suspects for minor crimes.

Somewhere, amid all the protests and some actual race card playing claims about police abusing hardened criminals, these officers finally got fed up.  It's like I've said before, if the people want to blame the police for everything, let the police depart and see what happens.  I'd love to see some gangs lead an evening of havoc and destruction in the homes of those that falsely accused.  Better yet, I wish I was a police officer investigating the home of one that falsely accused,  ("Oh, yeah, you've been broken in to?  And, your 80" television you stole during the last riots is now broken?  But, sir, the perps were simply good boys that were completely misunderstood.  I'm sure if you'd open your arms to those with the pistols and knives that you could reach them non violently.  In fact, why don't you go give it a try ... I'll wait ... you dumbass!")

6)  Absent Holiday Bosses.  Isn't it nice that the business hierarchy gets to enjoy national holidays, has multiple vacations and days off, enjoys needless travel, and makes his/her employees work outrageous hours and national holidays?  Corporate offices, filled with people who are expenditures, join in on having holidays off.  However, those that actually make the money for the business in the field are forced to work some or all of the five national holidays the United States makes available for recognition and celebration.  
How Quickly People Forget!

As this becomes more of a trend in business (i.e. Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Year's Day, Easter and 4th Of July openings), many workers are becoming dissatisfied with this "holier than thou" attitude of their employers.  Studies show there is a feeling among workers that their company is only concerned about profit, and the lives of those that toil endless hours are completely unimportant.  And, with several states now making workers unions illegal, independent work studies demonstrate many are wondering what can be done to stop this selfish business practice.  (Besides bringing AK-47's to work to emphasis their attitudes, that is!)

Of course, what company doesn't tell it is family oriented for the employees?  They just don't tell you it's the upper echelon's families to which they're oriented!  Sad thing is the greedy silver spoon's are only transferring this philosophy to their offspring.  It's amazing how much some people still cradle the old Communistic Philosophy of the U.S.S.R., which is to pay the minimum and force maximums.  (Shhhhhh!   Hush up, comrades!  The KGB is listening!)

7)  Oregon and Ohio State.   O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O, look who defeated the SEC's big powerhouse Alabama and the "We've always known we're gonna win it all" Florida State Seminoles in the college football ranks.  

Sorry, but those two teams have been so full of themselves all year long that it's damn good to see their bubbles burst.  Maybe now, sportscasters will start looking at the quality of the teams instead of the crap the Public Relation's Directors send out when ranking them.

I'm going out on a long shot to predict the national champion.  I've had a vision and will only give you this hint with which to make your bets.  "The winning team's name will start with an O!"

8)  Donna Douglas.  Ellie Mae Clampett is no more.  Donna Douglas has passed away at age 81.  For more than four decades, she attended convention after convention as Elly May Clampett, reliving her days as a television star.  I wish her well in the cement pond in the sky, taking care of all the animals, and hopefully, finding something to wear besides jeans that are way too tight for her!

9)  Fanged Frogs.  Okay, I know I did a story about fanged deer a month ago.  However, when I read this, I just couldn't resist.  

There's an Indonesian species of frog called the fanged frog that is now skipping the egg stage and going right to the tadpole stage.  Scientists are freaking out as the amphibians are carrying out a mammal style of birth.  

You can be sure scientists will find a way to spend millions of dollars on this research instead of putting it to good use taking care of some of mankind's ailments.  I'm just wondering when frog started developing fangs!  I can't imagine a frog croaking outside my window with a Bela Lugosi accent!

10)  Internet Shut Down ... Who Did It?   The U.S. just put out new sanctions against North Korea for messing around with Sony.  

North Korea still says it didn't do it.  

U.S. still says, "You did too, you did too!"  

North Korea still blames the U.S. for shutting it's Internet down.

U.S. still says, "We didn't do it!  You shut down your own Internet!"

North Korea still has the same screwed up leader it has had for years.

The U.S. still has the same screwed up government it has had for years!

Sounds like the beginning of a love story, doesn't it?

I'm just glad I didn't waste my money seeing "The Interview!"

Thanks North Korea!

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That's gonna do it!

See you next week!

Enjoy a week without another dysfunctional holiday!

Bet you've already broken a toy or two you got for Christmas!



  1. I hate new year's resolutions. I never make them.
    How do they keep losing big planes?
    I always thought it was kind of sad that Donna Douglas kept dressing like Ellie Mae when she was way too long in the tooth to get away with it. On a side note, the Clampett-mobile is alive and well (although not running) in the Ralph Foster Museum at College of the Ozarks.
    Your story was very well written; I enjoyed it. Unanswered prayers.

    1. Dyanne, so good to see you again!

      I wish I could tell you why planes keep going down. Perhaps, they always have and we've just now entered the age of communications that allows us to hear about them. Or, maybe they're just getting old and need replacing, but have gotten so expensive that replacement is impossible. Third option, and one that I'm betting on, is that the head officers of the companies are taking way too much in income and running the companies into the ground ... literally. Since it's been proven that 85 people in the world hold more wealth than the bottom third of the Earth's population, I wouldn't doubt it at all.

      I thought Donna had some talent and could have moved on in Hollywood. I'm thinking (without checking IMDB) that she was in a movie or two that flopped. Maybe she couldn't take not being on top and moved back into the fantasy world that allowed her to believe she was still as successful as she once was.

      I'm glad you liked the short. I thought it might surprise one or two. :) Many Thanks!

  2. I don't do resolutions, either, really. I can start a new thing (or stop) (or not) any damn day I feel like it, so why do we need New Year's to motivate us?
    I don't know about you, but Donna Douglas' passing sure does make me feel sort of middle-aged, being that I remember that show.
    I loved your story - sometimes unanswered prayers (to use Dyanne's term again) are the best. And I'm certain there's a country song about that, too.
    Happy new year to you!

    1. Lisa - Hello, my dear! Thanks for stopping by!

      Alas, age has crept up on us like a tomcat stalking the alley rat. I'm afraid of its pouncing, but there's nothing I can do to keep it from happening. There's been so many passing as of late, but hers and Joe Cocker's have hit home the greatest. The journey down the mountain is well on its way, unfortunately.

      I'm happy you liked my little story offering. I hadn't really considered the unanswered prayers avenue as much as the thankful route. And, yes, it was Garth Brooks that performed that song back in the 90's I believe.

      Happy New Year to you, too! I hope it's a great one for you! Many Thanks!

  3. You succeeded; I wouldn't have matched the story to the author. I enjoyed reading that side of you. :-)

    Fanged frogs skipping the egg stage? That is crazy--especially if the fangs are developed prior to birth!

    1. Kristi - This one was done with you in mind. Not, so as part of the story, but with our discussion last week in the comments. I have many sides, as we all do. I just have to be careful which one I show from time to time to maintain the integrity of my blog. lol

      I haven't investigated more than the base story about the fanged frog. To be honest, I came across the story as I was trying to rush and finish this post this week as I really ran out of time, not having had a day off since Christmas. It was odd enough to draw interest, and easy enough to do a quick punch line. You took the idea much further than I did, I must admit. Now, I'm going to have to do some research and find out more about it. Many Thanks!

  4. I would have said "YOU wrote this?" until I hit this "The bus never stopped for a bathroom break. Come to think of it, we must have been suffering some real constipation as we never thought to ask the driver to pull over. I'm sure he would have frowned, handed us an empty Coke bottle, and said, "Try this. Things go better with Coke!" THen I was all, yup, Rich wrote that! hahaha!

    1. Zoe - Hello, my friend!

      Well, you know I had to add a little bit of ridiculous humor in the short to give it my signature, don't you? lol Sometimes, a little comic relief helps to bring the dramatics much deeper range. I have no idea where that line came from (as with most of the short), but it worked well so I went with it. I must learn how to restrain myself in the future for anonymity's sake! lol Many Thanks!

  5. Definitely enjoyed this. I don't make resolutions, either. I'm more in line with "if ya wanna make a change, just do it now!" So...maybe I'll give up ice cream in May. Or never.
    Your think about the boss definitely struck a chord. When I started full time at the school where I am, they verbally told me (sadly, I didn't get it in writing), you'll make X amount. Will you take it?"
    I was elated. Said yes. A couple days later they were like, actually, it's X amount minus 1K. Are you still okay with that? You can't be making as much as so and so."
    Yeah, sure.
    Then I finished the master's and said, "Okay, you said I'd be making X amount now that I'm finished with the masters."
    The boss says, "No, you get a raise for the teaching part of your job. The admin part doesn't change."
    I wasn't expecting that kind of a response and didn't ask the proper questions, nor did I ask what the amount would ultimately be.
    But, since I work in a Wanderlust cult, I was planning on leaving anyways. THIS is why I'd like to go into business for myself. Jesus.
    (I wrote that here because I can't really announce it on the regular interwebs. They wouldn't look too kindly on that. And since you struck a chord, well, I just had to share. ;)
    Anyways, that story up there. Youz a perty good writer, yo! Loved it! Aww, isn't it interesting that as we age, we reminisce about youth, but when we're young and stupid, we have no idea what we have? LOL Cool story.

    1. Cindy, how nice to see you here again! I've still got the email as to your last posting in my mailbox (one of the few I haven't deleted) and intend on getting there. I just have been working so crazily and haven't had a day off since Christmas, that time hasn't allowed me to make it there yet.

      Business is becoming so ridiculous anymore. Your story is just one of many I've heard about the lies and deceptions that have been going on since the demise of the labor unions. If you get a chance to see the old silent film "Metropolis", please do so. After viewing it, you'll know exactly why I wanted you to experience it.

      Am honored you liked the short. I had an idea and went with it from scratch. Of course, life's experiences do sometimes add to the tales we tell, so there was probably some of me in there. I know what you're talking about in the age/understanding comparison, though. I just can't to figure out what I've got being old and stupid now. lol

      Many Thanks!

  6. Ohhhh but it's SWEET at the end :) I like it very much.

    I kindasortasometimes rely on you for my round-up of the news. I heard about the kid shooting the mama. That was just dumb as FUCK - WHY did she even have a...yaknow what? I won't even...

    I dunno who the lady is, and I have no idea about football.

    BUT the frogs are going to be oviviparous at most. It's only mammal-style, surely? They won't have an umbilical foetus - they'll just develop internally from eggs.

    1. Hey Sis! Good of you to visit!

      Glad you enjoyed my short. I thought I'd do a little something different for a change just to offset the last couple of weeks. Maybe it worked, maybe it didn't. I gave it a shot anyway. lol

      The news was really weak this week. A lot of repeat stuff that didn't deserve much attention. So, I had to throw a few things in that I normally wouldn't have, just to get to the "10" necessary. I guess I should be grateful for the lull.

      The frogs, well, that was one of those things. lol I was shocked to learn that they're not oviparous, in as far as the laying of eggs are concerned. It is a live birth (without the umbilical), similar to several species of reptiles. I'll have to look into it more if I can come up with the time. :) Many Thanks!

  7. A box of rocks... well if that is not the charlie brownest christmas present ever I don't know what is.

    I don't do resolutions. Mainly because I forget.

    One more reason I do not like frogs. Frogs with fangs is not something I would want to come across.

    1. Erin, always good to see you here!

      The rocks thing got me. Can you imagine the face of the girl the present was for. And, if you're the giver, how do you ever explain it without looking like a total ass? Maybe if Walmart would pay their people a little larger wage and give them a little more time off, they'd be more concerned about checking returns.

      There was a grade B movie back in the very early 70's titled Frogs. It basically was a tale of nature getting even with mankind for polluting the Earth. Alligators, snakes, and such were all controlled by the frogs to do their killing. It's not a great movie, but it did have its moments for shock factor.

      Many Thanks!

  8. holyfuckme I couldn't even do the thankfuls as the story - well the story. You my brother unvisited for too long but still from another mother and mine in my heart - that story about the hands and the aging... that, well, got me big time. Huge time. That was enough thankful for me. Also happy new year. Also I miss you. Also, our book???? Is it gonna???

    1. It's My Sister From Another Mother!!!!!!! Hey, lady, where the hell you been, anyway? lol I know, you've been so busy becoming popular and winning all sorts of awards and such. I've been watching and am so proud of you. At least someone in the family is proving themselves. :)

      I'm really glad you liked my short! I wanted to keep it mine (thus the humor and sarcasm), but I kept it to a minimum to bring about a different side of my writing that many have yet to see. Seems like most comments are favorable, which tends to ease the doubts a little.

      Yes, our book is almost finished. I'm doing a little something for it that may be a surprise to some, but will hopefully help it out somewhat. "What?" you ask. Shhhhhhh ..... it's a secret. lol Many Thanks!