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| Hi y'all! It's me again! |
The girl of girls,
the furry fan
of fabulous friends,
the magical mommy
of mommies,
the demonic cat
of Kentucky Flatt,
yes, ladies,
I have returned!!!
Gabriela's In The House!!!
(Boom Shaka Laka, Boom Shaka Laka!)
I knew I'd get my way and get my own day to blog if I created a big enough fit over it! Rich has agreed to let me have my day!
Of course, I had to threaten him a little.
We argued about it some, but he finally saw my side of the story when I asked him (while I was sharpening my claws) if he'd like to wake up one morning with the same abilities to please a woman that Faletame has!
I said,
"Richiepoo, I ain't no vet,
but I can say I surely bet,
my claws can make a difference, in the way you set ... down!"
Girls, he quickly saw it my way! lol Just remember, to properly inspire, you gotta show some fire!
So, now I got my day to blog. I just gotta figure out something to talk about! Like that's ever been a problem for me.
Being a mommy, I guess I can talk about mommies. I can hear y'all's knees knockin' now!
"Oh, Gabriela ... be gentle! You know we love our kids and husband with all our lives! We'd do anything to make them happy! We always try to show love and affection!"
Who do you think y'all are talkin' to, girls? Y'all just like me ... as long as you're in control, you're the baddest bitch on the block! Then, when something goes too far, you just say, "What have I got myself into", start blamin' someone else, say the hell with the diet, eat a half gallon of Cookies 'N Cream ice cream, and then call your cryin' buddy and let out all your guilty feelin's about how you should be appreciated more!
Ladies, that's what we do! Be loud and be proud!
I remember my six kids! In fact, I think of them all the time ... and am happy to have them out of my life! Oh chill now, I'm just jokin'! I loved them, for about five minutes after they was born. Then, girls, they started feedin' on me.
OH....MY....GOD...!!!! The little suckers had teeth!!!
Y'all's kids don't get teeth till they're done feedin' on you. Mine were born with them! Big long fangs that would dig way down to your back bone and scrap the fleas off the vertebrae!
You know how it feels when your boyfriend, oops, hubby are in that sexy lovin' mood and he starts goin' a little crazy on you and bites down when he shouldn't??? (Yeah, we know where to get them back for that ... don't we girls?)
But, imagine, six of those darling dears bitin' you at once! I swear, I just about decided immediately that all of them were gonna go on a starvation diet right out of the pod!
But, it's all about a mother's love. I laid there, day after day, as my six little, lovin' babies sucked in their breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Six furry frocks of feedin' frenzy ... just going to town on all I had to offer.
I'd always heard that a mother's love was unconditional. If I'd have known about the bitin' condition, I might have thought twice about gettin' conditionally pregnant!
However, as a lovin' mother, I had just one thought,
"When the hell y'all gonna start eatin' solid food?"
Well, they got older real fast. And before you know it, they're gone! I really miss them sometimes. They don't even write! It's kind of like, "Gee Mom, thanks for the food. Gotta go! Maybe see you around!"
Ain't that the fate we have, ladies? We're used by men, used by kids, and then expected to be the lovin', sweet, devoted creatures we portray ourselves to be.
Gets cha all mushy inside. Kind of makes you want to start drinkin'... again! Least, that's my excuse! lol
Anyway, I guess the moral of this blog is,
"Love and enjoy y'all's kids and husband as long as they're around.
Almost nothin' lasts forever, and along with the good, comes some pain!
Plus, there's always wine for the whine!
So, open that sucker up!"
* * * * * * * * * * *
***If y'all want, I'll be back next Monday. I'm thinkin' about talkin' about the subject "Men-O-Pause!" Remember, Rich will only let me come back if you comment favorably! Let him know what you think below!
Later!
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| Now, if you don't mind, I've gotta get my beauty sleep! Writing a blog is a lot of work! |
Seriously Rich you need help, lol!! Joking, I love this idea of giving Gabriella her own day, because she really brings a whole new perspective to the table for your page and she also gets to say things you would never be able to say. That said, I vote to keep the old girl around for her weekly column. Great job and Happy Monday!! :)
ReplyDeleteDahrling Janine - Gabriela here! I agree, Rich does need some help! (I've known that since my first day in his house, lol!) That's exactly why I'm blogging, dear! Oh yes, I'm gonna say what I'm gonna say, and no one can stop me. But, who would want to? : ) I'm really not that old though, I just hit three, which is 21 in your years. I think you might be a little older than that (like a decade plus, lol), so please, save some Gray Away for me. One day I might need it! : ) Take care!
DeleteYes, she needs a day. It's fun to hear Gabriela's perspective, haha. Love the narrative and her story. And I can tell she's a sweet, sweet kitty. :D
ReplyDeleteCyndi - Good to see you here! Yes, life from my perspective is a little different, like about five feet lower around most of you humans! lol Glad you liked my tale (and "no", I'm not stooping to saying, "Tail" there)! My dear, I am a sweet dahrling. If you don't believe it, just ask the Tom's around the block! It was so nice of you to put my picture in your blog Sunday. Of course, how could you refuse such a beautiful and humble subject? Take care!
DeleteWoohoo!! Yeah, go Gabriela, I knew you could do it! Richard, this is one of my favourite posts to read on Mondays as of immediate effect...LOVE it! Can't wait for next week's post.
ReplyDeleteMelanie - Hello dear! Still not showing any kittie pictures, huh? I'm keeping my eyes on you. You go too, girl! Go get some cats saved instead of all those mangy mutts you hang around with. lol I'll see what I can do next week. You may be a little young for the subject matter, but it's never too early to learn! Take care!
Deletehehe. You go Gabriela. Love the posts when the cat gets her voice!
ReplyDeleteJulie, Julie, Julie - Do you realize that you're the reason I got to write my blog? I said, "Rich, if a blonde can write a blog that people read, and not resort to nudity, well I can write a blog, and maybe include nudity!" Of course, Rich said no to the nudity, but a girl knows to always ask for more to get what she wants! lol Glad you like my posts! Take Care!
DeleteThis is my first time visiting your blog, but I will be back. This made my otherwise craptastic Monday a little bit better.
ReplyDeleteTamera - Helllloooo, dear! Good to have you drop by! My goodness, I hooked you on only one blog. I wondered if there were many as easy as I was the first time! lol Glad you stopped in! Oh, don't forget, Rich writes, too. Visit us both when you get the chance! Take care, dear!
Deletehaha...loved Gabriela for this awesome post. Her earrings were GIMPed up beautifully that they actually looked real to me for a while.
ReplyDeleteYes, I would love to read about her side of men-o-pause on next monday :)
Ruchira - So good to see you today! I love you too, dahrling! You've got the most beautiful dark hair ... almost as pretty as mine! lol I will have you know those earrings were prepared special for me. Rich knew better than to try to pierce my ears (they're so tender, you know) so he used a little paste to help me out! I thought they accented my cheek line about as good as Beyonce's tights did hers at the Super Bowl! lol Take care!
DeleteHa - I love Gabriela as a fellow mom blogger. She cracks me up! And I'm all for the wine too! :)
ReplyDeleteEmily, my dear - How proper a name you have! I love it! It's almost as proper as Gabriela! lol You're so sweet in loving me! I thought I'd reserve that for only Tomcats, but who knows! Variety is the spice of life! lolol Drink that wine, girl! I can almost hear you hiccup! Take care!
DeleteGabriela is doing awesome as a guest blogger for you... of course we do understand it took some convincing. Us women are like that! Funny funny stuff!
ReplyDeleteStacy - Hello dahrling! Thanks for noticing what I'm doing for Rich here! (He needs all the help he can get, the poor boy.) It was a real battle to get him to let me blog. After I threatened him, as I said in my blog, he still resisted some. Then I told him, "Honey, you're old, but you ain't dead. If you've ever got any hope to using what you've got again, you better let me at that keyboard!" He relented, finally. I didn't have the heart to tell him he doesn't have a chance in hell of having THAT type of fun again! lol Take care!
DeleteI love the idea of Gabriela having a regular guest post day! She is audacious and highlarious!
ReplyDeleteAudrey - Gabriela here, dear! I'm so glad you're on my side, as well as like my blog! Anything to keep Rich from writing ... Right? lol Btw, I love your poetry. (and you thought I was gonna say it's purrrfect, didn't you? lol) Rich was reading it last night and asked me if that was the type of writing I could do. Girl, I can't touch your poetry. I told Rich that if he was to send me to college, we'd see what I could write. That shut him up! Take care!
DeleteGabriela, you are a great guest blogger. I could definitely go for an every week feature. You have style, you say it like it is, you take no prisoners (owner included). And us mommy bloggers NEED some advice about men-o-pause.
ReplyDeleteRachel - Girl, how you doing? If I said I didn't love your comments I'd be lying! Rich always says, "Don't let it go to your head. They can change on you with one wrong post." I don't believe it! I love all of you here and love the fact y'all want me back! I guess quality people recognize quality ... right? lol Oh, Rich is okay, but he's a typical guy ... sports, food, and more sports. Give him a basketball game and he'll pretty much let me do as I want! : ) I'll be sure to enlighten all the girls next week on that specific topic! I can't wait! Take care!
DeleteHere Kitty Kitty! Lol. I think Gabriel is doing a great job:)
ReplyDeleteKelly - So good to see you, Of course I'm doing a great job, dahrling! That's the only way to do it! lol Least, that's what all the Tomcats used to say before my vet's Planned Parenthood visit! : ) Thanks for your input! I think we're about to get Rich to let me keep this thing going for a while! Yay! Take care!
DeleteWelcome back, Gabriela!! Long time no see and I miss you and your cattiness. Don't get too naughty now!
ReplyDeleteMichelle - How are you, girl? It's been ages since we've talked. You've got to stop being a stranger and stop by more often. I'll even have some tea ready for you next time. You and Melanie are my friends with dogs (and I ain't talkin' about your husbands, lol). I don't have many of them for good reasons! See, I'll only let you in if you keep your dogs on a leash so they'll be good! (Maybe I am talking about your husbands.) Naughty? Me, dahrling? Why, this girl learned from that blonde in those old movies that Rich watches for some reason. What did she say? Oh, yes! "When I'm good, I'm good! But when I'm bad, I'm really good!" lol That's me all over! Take care!
Delete