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It's all about Halloween.
I'd forgotten that Halloween is next week, not this week.
So much for
the beautiful post.
the beautiful post.
So, here I am, sitting here wondering what I can write about that will be worth posting. I ask myself that because for the last several weeks, I've written several posts that I have not published.
I find myself in a niche that I'm having a hard time exiting. A niche that continuously attempts to enlighten the masses about the profundity of our political structure, the degradation of common sense, and the ignorance of mankind that surrounds us.
No wonder I'm always in such a great mood.
I could talk about the walk in the park with the one I love. How gorgeous the trees and flowers and green grass as the butterflies flutter about our heads ... and the gnats occasionally enter our mouths. The warmth of one hand in the other, as we walk side by side ... being led away by police officers that didn't appreciate our becoming part of nature in the bushes. Smiles being shared as we gaze ahead at the cameras ... taking our mugshots, before being taken to our cells for another joyous evening ... with our new partners ... or "cell buddies" if you will.
I should, but since it never happened I'd only be making things up.
Or, would I?
I could write about how much I'm looking forward to the Winter ahead. The brisk breezes chilling you to the bone as your overcoat blows open ... exposing the "Hey, little girl" attire underneath. Or, we could imagine rolling together down a snow covered hill that seemed never ending ... as the park security stumbled through the drifts chasing us in full determination. Or, I could describe the brightness and warmth of the room where the camera flashed, taking mugshots ... oh, wait a minute. We've already been there. Sorry!
But, I'd be fabricating once again.
Or, would I?
Sitting here, I have the opportunity to reach out to all my friends with open arms and hands ... requesting handouts whenever possible. A chance to rekindle old friendships in hopes of developing new relationships ... with their wives while they're at work. A way to ensure new friendships will be forthcoming continually through my life ... after the mugshots are taken and new "cell buddies", oops, sorry. Another repeat.
The written word is my slave and the page knows only I as its master. I have the power to create as I will and demand what I must. I have complete control over this and your television set. Do not attempt to change the channel. For the next ten minutes I will control all. For I reign supreme. I am in charge! I am the controller!
Just give me a second. My wife just asked me to take out the garbage. I'll be right back.
Or, will I?
Okay, now I'm back. It's time for
TEN THINGS OF THANKFUL!!!!
This week, I'm going to lighten things up a little bit as I've found a few of you don't like to think as much as scan. As I don't want these few to miss something in their quest to finish without understanding, I'll now revert back to my sixth-grade writing level and begin.
This week ... I'm Thankful For:
1) ... Showers. Not only do they make you nice and clean, they can save a life.
This week, my wife lounged around until 1 p.m. before taking a shower on her day off. When she heard the knock on the door, she wasn't dressed to answer it. Fifteen minutes later, police sirens were heard. Within minutes, ambulances arrived at a house three doors down and the police crime scene tape was being strung out.
Seems a couple of individuals were knocking at doors until they got someone to answer. Then, they'd force their way into a house and rob the occupants. At least, that was their plan.
Unfortunate for them, they forced their way into a home thinking only the lady of the house was present. Once inside, they found three fully grown men confronting them. In the scuffle that followed, one of the three innocents was shot in the back, one of the guilty fled the scene, and the other guilty party was held down by the two other innocents until the police arrived.
If it hadn't have been for the shower, my wife could've been the victim.
Keep clean, honey!
2) ... Crime Free Communities. When we moved to our neighborhood, 22 years ago, it was known as a "Crime Free" neighborhood. Since then, I've ran drug pushers off the block by video taping their house 24/7 and letting them know the police had a copy of all the license plates of those that visited them, my neighbor's home was robbed, a mentally ill individual attacked a lady taking her daily walk, my wife was able to scare away a person attempting to kick our back door down, and now, this latest occurrence (described above).
I'm guessing that thieves don't have anything to rob in their own neighborhoods, so they come to ours.
If I'm ever home when it happens, I can only say one thing ...
"I'd like for you to say "Hello" to my little friend and sixteen of his buddies.
Oops! i guess they couldn't wait to make your acquaintance.
Oh, you want gun control? Watch me control where the gun shoots.
Next time, stay in your own neighborhood!"
Just call me Mr. Rogers as "it's a wonderful day in the neighborhood,
a wonderful day in the neighborhood ... "
Just call me Mr. Rogers as "it's a wonderful day in the neighborhood,
a wonderful day in the neighborhood ... "
3) ... Religious Cults. The Word of Life church had a meeting a couple of weeks ago. During this meeting, two teens were disciplined. From this "discipline", one died and the other was hospitalized.
Now, to the church, this act was a necessity. The guilty parties state that it was to beat the practice of witchcraft out of them. It was reported that the teens had been making voodoo dolls and had threatened to make one of their pastor.
The surviving youth denies this. In fact, police have said it was because of the youths desire to leave the church for good that the incident occurred.
Either way, one is dead and the other is mending his physical wounds. Who knows how long the mental ones will take. It is a reminder to all of us that following a religion doesn't mean you have to take abuse by man. Our judgment lies above, not by a group of idiots that have no other intent but to inflict pain.
4) ... Russian President Vladimir Putan. According to opinion polls, the Russian president has an approval rating of 89% among Russian citizens. Even at worst, considering a maximum error difference of 20%, the man still has an approval rating that makes our last few American Presidents envious, to say the least.
Russians seem to prefer his "take charge" attitude, his "take no crap" mannerisms, and his "I'm President of one of the largest countries in the world and don't you forget it" style. His domestic and international successes have been scorned by many in the democratic world, yet those that reside in Russia feel as though he's taking care of those at home first and worrying about everyone else second.
Gee, that's the way it was in this country once. However, for the last two decades, few are pleased with the way things are, presidential approval ratings barely hit 50%, and the populace is always bitching about one thing or another. How about updating our National Anthem to fit the times?
5) ... Immigrant Businesses. According to a recent study done by Pew Research, 30% of the new businesses created last year were created by immigrants. These are main street businesses (restaurants, shops and such), and usually maintain a highly visible presence.
This really puts Americans to shame as only 17% are self-employed.
I'm guessing it's one of two reasons for this. 1) Many Americans that owned individual businesses have fallen victim to the "Big Box" retailers over the years and grew disgusted fighting a losing battle to stay afloat against the cheap labor rates overseas, or 2) Americans are lazy as hell and want someone else to handle all the legal paperwork, insurance, and managerial duties while they take vacations, sick days, and stretch expense accounts to the max.
7) ... No Criminal Charges For IRS Officials. The Department of Justice has decided not to charge any IRS official for targeting specific groups.
8) ... Goran Olsen. Hiking 150 miles west of Oslo, Norway, Goran found a 1,200 year old Viking sword. He stated he found it while digging under a pile of rocks.
9) ... The Plague. What you learned in school may just be wrong. Originally thought to have started during the days of the Roman Empire, scientists, in examining teeth and other remains, have decided that the plague may have started at the time of the Bronze Age 5,000 years ago. In addition, they report that it was transmitted by humans instead of fleas and rats.
10) ... LaGuardia Airport. Yes, New York's famous LaGuardia International Airport has been chosen as the worst airport in America. Surprisingly, Chicago's O'Hare was way down the list at number ten.
The surviving youth denies this. In fact, police have said it was because of the youths desire to leave the church for good that the incident occurred.
Either way, one is dead and the other is mending his physical wounds. Who knows how long the mental ones will take. It is a reminder to all of us that following a religion doesn't mean you have to take abuse by man. Our judgment lies above, not by a group of idiots that have no other intent but to inflict pain.
But, then again, Jim Jones and David Koresh might disagree.
Kool Aid, anyone?
Russians seem to prefer his "take charge" attitude, his "take no crap" mannerisms, and his "I'm President of one of the largest countries in the world and don't you forget it" style. His domestic and international successes have been scorned by many in the democratic world, yet those that reside in Russia feel as though he's taking care of those at home first and worrying about everyone else second.
Gee, that's the way it was in this country once. However, for the last two decades, few are pleased with the way things are, presidential approval ratings barely hit 50%, and the populace is always bitching about one thing or another. How about updating our National Anthem to fit the times?
"O say can you see,
by the shopping mall's lights,
by the shopping mall's lights,
What so proudly we watch,
Kardashian's TV.
Tiny seats on our jets,
squeeze our asses real tight,
No Smoking is the norm,
so eat more and buy new clothes.
Kardashian's TV.
Tiny seats on our jets,
squeeze our asses real tight,
No Smoking is the norm,
so eat more and buy new clothes.
And, McDonald's yellow arch,
and KFC pails,
and KFC pails,
Give proof on the scales,
heart attacks will prevail.
heart attacks will prevail.
O' say do those PC'er's
still bitch about everything,
still bitch about everything,
The land of no middle class,
and the home of Jared's thing."
and the home of Jared's thing."
LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT ... IF YOU CAN AFFORD TO!
OTHERWISE, GET A CREDIT CARD AND GO BROKE
LIKE THE REST OF US!
OTHERWISE, GET A CREDIT CARD AND GO BROKE
LIKE THE REST OF US!
5) ... Immigrant Businesses. According to a recent study done by Pew Research, 30% of the new businesses created last year were created by immigrants. These are main street businesses (restaurants, shops and such), and usually maintain a highly visible presence.
This really puts Americans to shame as only 17% are self-employed.
I'm guessing it's one of two reasons for this. 1) Many Americans that owned individual businesses have fallen victim to the "Big Box" retailers over the years and grew disgusted fighting a losing battle to stay afloat against the cheap labor rates overseas, or 2) Americans are lazy as hell and want someone else to handle all the legal paperwork, insurance, and managerial duties while they take vacations, sick days, and stretch expense accounts to the max.
See what happens when you grow up playing video games all day!
6) ... Hurricane Patricia. The strongest hurricane on record is going to be hitting Mexico this weekend. Scientists predict catastrophic damage when landfall is reached, stretching into the billions of dollars.
In a related story, Colorado pot retailers are increasing prices of El Primo weed this weekend as shortages are predicted as soon as Mexico takes a hit from Patricia. Said one retailer, "Wow, man, this is just like oil prices. Whatta rush!"
7) ... No Criminal Charges For IRS Officials. The Department of Justice has decided not to charge any IRS official for targeting specific groups.
Said one anonymous source,
"Hell, they screw everyone that can't screw them!"
8) ... Goran Olsen. Hiking 150 miles west of Oslo, Norway, Goran found a 1,200 year old Viking sword. He stated he found it while digging under a pile of rocks.
However, this extraordinary find has its downside. Seems Goran had forgotten
where he'd left his Mexican weed and was frantically searching for it in order to take advantage of the price gouging weekend ahead when Hurricane Patricia hits Mexico.
Flying overhead, the Marvel Avenger, Thor, saw what Goran was doing
and smashed his skull flatter than your mother's ironed panties as a form
of punishment. Goran's family wept.
Okay, okay, I made up the last two paragraphs.
Had you going though, didn't it?
9) ... The Plague. What you learned in school may just be wrong. Originally thought to have started during the days of the Roman Empire, scientists, in examining teeth and other remains, have decided that the plague may have started at the time of the Bronze Age 5,000 years ago. In addition, they report that it was transmitted by humans instead of fleas and rats.
The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals has readied a lawsuit that will be filed as soon as the living relatives of the Pied Piper are found. Should you have any informations concerning their whereabouts, please notify your local society branch.
10) ... LaGuardia Airport. Yes, New York's famous LaGuardia International Airport has been chosen as the worst airport in America. Surprisingly, Chicago's O'Hare was way down the list at number ten.
Says anyone that's ever flown out of or in to O'Hare ...
Dat's Bull, Dat's Bull, Dat's Bull!!!
And, that's going to do it for another edition of
Ten Things Of Thankful!!!
Stop in next week for the post that was going to be this week
until it was discovered this week wasn't next week.
Confused? Come back next week and it'll all make sense!
Oh, and please leave all comments below!
Oh, and please leave all comments below!
Ciao!!
Amazing story of the Shower that saved your wife. And I love the reworded anthem.
ReplyDeleteVal, so good to see you again!
DeleteYes, my wife was indeed lucky. I'm just happy she'd passed on her weekly Saturday shower and held off until Monday! :)
The anthem ... well ... I just thought the other one was slightly outdated. We all need to catch up with the times every now and then.
Thanks loads for stopping by and commenting. Greatly appreciated!
I'm so glad your wife is OK! What a scary thing!
ReplyDeleteKristi, Thanks so much for coming by!
DeleteMy wife and I have been married 35 years, and only since moving to Lexington have we ever had any problems with rednecks, criminals, and dumb asses (excuse me but it's true). I honestly don't know what it is about this city, but extreme behavior seems to be the norm. Sometimes we wonder if it's the change in society's mannerisms or simply the area. It's sad, and a little scary as we age and become more of a target.
Really appreciate your comments. Many Thanks!
Between your wife's work at the pharmacy and answering the front door, she needs you as a bodyguard 24/7. I swear! Glad she's safe.
ReplyDeleteAs for the marijuana thing...I grew up in Colorado and most of my family lives there. My dad was so against it at first until they got the HUGEST tax surplus and CO is having to figure out what to do with the extra money...haha...
The immigrant business thing is interesting, too. I work with primarily Latino kids and the kids are pretty US Americanized. But their parents? They'll come to me to pick up their kids, headed on to their second or third job of the day. I can't even imagine. But then again...maybe that's why only 17 percent of us "regular" American folk do...
I prefer the literary business, though. Haha
Relgious cults. You know...I grew up Catholic and became Episcopalian awhile back. They like to drink a lot. LOL. But even then I often wonder why I even bothered to do that. Really, can't we just all have our own spiritual way, stop being offended at everyone else, and stop using religion as an excuse to exclude others? I mean no one ever had a war over Santa Clause or the Ghost of Jacob Marley. Sheesh.
Good to see ya here. :)
Hey Cindy, really good to see you here!
DeleteWhere do I start here? lol As far as my wife is concerned, it has definitely been a strange couple of years, for sure. I've taken her to the shooting range several times so she knows how to handle a pistol. I hate that it is a necessity to do that, but since I can't be here, or with her, 24/7 it's the only thing we can do to try to ensure her safety. It's so sad that we have to live this way, but considering the alternatives, it's better to be safe than sorry.
I'm all for legalization of marijuana. There's only two reasons that it's not legal everywhere already. One is the alcohol industry has lobbied against it for years. They realize that they will sustain a drop in business if people can find an alternative that will help them achieve a high without a hangover. The other reason is all the propaganda that has been spread about it over the years. Racist stories about it being the drug of the ghetto, movies made in the 30's about going crazy after only one toke, constant advertising stating that marijuana leads to harder stuff, and politicians filling their pockets with alcohol lobby money and voting against legalization has been the norm. I'd love to see it legalized ... and, would probably revisit my college days habits once again. :)
Immigrants and business ... who can debate that they work harder than most? Hispanics and Asians both demonstrate that Whites and Blacks need to take lessons from their efforts to succeed. You don't see many waiting in unemployment lines at all. Could it be that they are willing to work at anything instead of feeling owed or privileged? Says something about our society, doesn't it?
Cults ... well, I'm not a fan of organized religion. I truly believe, but I have a difficult time listening to some guy standing at the alter expressing what he thinks is right and wrong. Too many people are caught up in the words of men instead of the words of God. From Jim Jones to ISIS, men use religion as an excuse to rule, gain financial wealth, and kill. It is rumored that religion was developed to help the ruling class keep the working class in line. Promises of "do as we want and you'll end up with a great afterlife" seem to confirm this belief. Still, I'm of the age I don't want to question it ... just in case. :)
You always leave such great comments. Thanks so much for visiting!
Good heavens! I'm glad your wife and the people in the other house are safe. I can't believe this is in Lexington! I've been there briefly a couple of times. I thought it was just a bunch of horses and a college. Stay safe!
ReplyDeleteI don't doubt the immigrant statistic, based on the people I know. The south side of Indy is home to the largest population of Burmese refugees. They are far from being slackers!
I cannot believe O'Hare is so far down on the list. I can't stand having to go through there! Makes me wonder how horrible the other 8 are. I don't want to find out the hard way, though.
Way to pare down the post. Read every word. ;)
Christine - I'm so glad you stopped by this week!
DeleteThere's been no word on the gentleman that was shot. Ours is a neighborhood where most keep to themselves and we'd never met them, I'm sorry to say. It does surprise me too that Lexington has turned out to be so violent. It definitely gives the appearance of a city that offers a degree of safety. Unfortunately, it seems to be only an appearance.
I'm impressed by the work ethic of immigrants. Perhaps it's because many work in establishments where the whole family works together. Still, you really don't see that from the groups that look for government handouts instead.
I'm not a fan of O'Hare either. Being a smoker, it's easily a 15 minute jaunt to the gates from outside, which makes things a pain.
Thanks for all the comments. Yes, I'm working at keeping it shorter. Hopefully, others will appreciate it. Many Thanks!
Phew, what a list. Glad the missus is alright!
ReplyDeleteHello, old friend! We've got to talk more. It's been way too long.
DeleteShe's surviving, but there is still a stress level that she's dealing with. You consider your home to be the one safe place you can relax within. When things happen like has happened over the last couple of years, that seems to be taken away. That is what now must be dealt with.
Thanks so much for coming by. Greatly appreciated!
Gosh so glad you're wife didn't answer that door! I love your way of doing TToT! You've just made me realise that it doesn't have to be too personal. Think you just inspired me! :)
ReplyDeleteHey AD, thanks so much for visiting. Nice to see you here!
DeleteI appreciate you empathy. I'm happy, too. We've been together too long for me to have to start over ... especially since every woman has her own method for training her mate. I've just gotten somewhat used to this one's. :)
I performed stand-up for many years. In doing so, sarcasm was a big part of the act. Over the years, I've noticed that the politically correct society abhors it, which allows me to continue my battle against PC. Being completely against the "herd" mentality and a fighter for individual thought and tolerance, TTOT allows me a forum to express the insanity in which we live and are being somewhat forced to become a part. It's personal, but at the same time, directed to hit a nerve many dislike knowing even exists. So far, it seems to be working. I appreciate you enjoying it.
Thanks again for stopping in. Many Thanks!
Let's expand the worst airport range a bit north. Toronto makes O'Hare seem to run on the efficiency of a well oiled machine!
ReplyDeleteThe story about the home invaders was truly frightening. Hope the man who was shot is recovering well.
May - So good of you to take time to visit. Greatly appreciated!
DeleteI've only been to Quebec's airport in Canada, and really didn't have any problems there. I believe you about Toronto's. I seem to remember them being on the International List, but cannot recall their placement.
I really have no idea as to the condition of the break in victim. We're not a close community here as most keep to themselves. It's just very sad that crime is spreading into all neighborhoods now, instead of staying at home.
Again Many Thanks! Please visit again!
Another vote for being glad your wife's shower kept her safe! That's just too darn close for comfort!
ReplyDeleteAlways love your TToT formats - I learn something every time!
Lisa, thank you so much for coming back and commenting again!
DeleteIt's funny how fate can either cause or inhibit things from taking place. (Or, could it be Karma ... who knows?) Like you, I'm very happy that she's safe. Now, we've just got to work on keeping her that way.
I'm happy you like the format I use for TTOT. It is really quite a bit of work that goes into them, believe it or not, and it's always good to hear positives about them. I always love your comments, too. Next week, I promise a different style, especially at the beginning. Please come back and experience something a little different. Many Thank!
I totally understand the mix up with thinking Halloween was this week. I'll return here next week as you have my curiosity now.
ReplyDeleteHey, Kerry, thanks for showing up!
DeleteHopefully, you won't be disappointed. It's going to be something much different than usual. Many Thanks!
Rich, I love the dark humour here. Thanks for the chuckle...and #1 - holy shit! I'm glad your wife is OK.
ReplyDeleteVincent, so good of you to stop in and comment!
DeleteDark humor and sarcasm have always been my specialties. I love them because they tend to make people think a little more than the slapstick, face front styles. And, when people think, they tend to get more involved. Glad you enjoyed it.
Oh, and the wife's okay. I just have to remember to check that her safety is on before surprising her at the kitchen sink.
Appreciate the comments. Many Thanks!
I certainly can understand how your wife and you too could be feeling a bit of stress after that happening. One hopes that those things can't happen any place, let alone your own neighborhood. That there was a hurricane of such magnitude and having its name be my own made me want to change my name. Not really, but still, hurricane's just shouldn't have such a nice name. LOL
ReplyDeletePat, Really appreciate you stopping in and commenting. Sorry it took me a couple of days to get back to you.
DeleteIt is irritating when your "safe zone" is intruded upon. We all like to think our neighborhoods to be the one place we can relax at home and escape the monsters of the world. When that proves to be only a fantasy, the stress factor does make itself known.
Wow, having a hurricane named after me would be interesting. My wife would probably say it would be the only thing that could get me moving. lol Seriously, we experienced four or five of them when we lived along the Alabama Gulf Coast, and none were any fun. Perhaps they should name them after politicians. After all, the bigger the bag of wind, the more damage it causes in both circumstance! :)
Please come back, again! Many Thanks!
Strange breed, the Russians. Putin strikes me as one of the most obnoxious men strutting the planet. He must be corrupt on so many different levels. But each to our own, I guess. I hope you're well - you sound as strident in your views as ever, so that must mean that you are fine!
ReplyDeleteGary, thanks so much for coming by!
DeleteI read your post on Amsterdam yesterday, but had no time to comment being here at work. So many memories. Ever hear of a bar there called the Milky Way? They used to sell the best hash around. lol
I wonder if Putin is corrupt, or just creating a Russion Bear image as many of their leaders in the 50's and 60's did. He seems to have the people on his side, which is more than I can claim for any politician here in the states.
I'm suffering from some shoulder problems at present, but will survive. Besides, what's life without some pain in it? :)
Greatly appreciate your stopping in. Many Thanks!