I'm A Twitter Dummy ... So Tweet That!!!

I'm a Twitter dummy.

I just read Julie DeNean's article about Twitter  ... and I'm still somewhat lost.  That's bad, because this article was written with the slow witted person in mind.  

Yeah, she had me in mind, 

I'm sure!

Julie DeNean professionally produced it knowing that there were some people that simply didn't get it.  So, she kindly provided a step by step process, complete definitions, beautiful directions, and even pictures.

I still don't get it.

Then again, I've never been one to follow trends.

To me, Twittering is something that a bird does.  

I'm obviously not a bird.  Birds don't smoke.

Howie Mandel constantly tweets on America's Got Talent.  I'm happy for him.  One day, he'll get a real life.  Then again, Howie Mandel is a multi-millionaire.  

Maybe he's onto something.

I joined Twitter over a year ago as a means to promote my blog.  Instead, I get notifications every time someone else promotes my blog.  I really should Tweet to thank them for doing so, but I don't know how.  So, I sit here, looking at all the promoting going on, and feel somewhat helpless as others do my work for me.

At least I'm not a complete 

self promoting ass!

I receive Tweets from others as well.  Tom Crean, the coach of Indiana University's basketball team is on my Twitter list to follow.  He seems like a nice guy.  

I wonder if Tweeting people makes you a nice person? 

Nawwwwww, just coaching the right team does! 

A while back, several people I know held a Twitter party.  Afterwards, a couple of them that hosted it got banned from Twitter for a while.  I guess Twitter doesn't want people communicating party information, only Tweeting nonsensical codes.

Twitter sounds like a group of politicians with everyone trying to say something at once, according to the latest trend, but no one really understands what's being said.  No wonder the rest of the world looks at our government and shakes it head in disbelief.

By the way, I wonder how 

John McCain's 

video poker game is going?

I wonder if twerking can be done on Twitter?  Miley Cyrus is supposedly Tweeting on Twitter about her Twerking all the time. 

 Whatever happened to the dance called the Twist?  If someone Tweeted on Twitter about Twisting, and someone else Tweeted on Twitter about Twerking, would it be called a Twisting Twerking day on Twitter trend, or a Twerking Twisted trend on Twitter? 

Would it really matter?

I guess the politicians would care.  According to them, they care about everything.  Or, so they Tweet.  But, I bet it's really their aides that are doing the Tweeting.  

(My apologies, I gave the politicians too much credit for Twitter knowledge.  

Please excuse me, I've been sick the last few days.)

So, for now, I must make efforts to tweak my twerking, twisted Twitter skills.  Then, one day, I'll understand Twitter.  Of course, by that time, everyone will be doing something else.  

That's okay.  That will provide a topic for another blog.  

Of course, by then 

I might be twitching.

Would that be a twitching Tweet about twisted twerking tweak, then, or a tweak about a twerking twisted Tweet about twitching?  Or, is that what happens when one Tweets while driving?

One might say this whole thing resembles a pile of twisted El Toro defecation.

It might be fun to see that Tweeted.  

Just be sure to wash your hands 

if you receive it!